Wednesday, October 21, 2015


If you've followed my blog for any amount of time you know that my main struggle in living in MO is being lonely.  It's a weird loneliness because as a stay-at-home mama I am never alone.  Ever.  Since James basically works from his home office, he's here a lot, too so I am truly never alone.  Wonderful, right?  No.  I have never been lonelier.

I left many good friends in Louisville: seminary friends, church friends, and work friends.  There was such blessings.  Moving here, I realized very quickly how difficult it is to make friends as an adult.  Especially in a small town unfamiliar with transplants; people have their families and their friends they've known since grade school.  Circles are pretty much closed.

I've been praying and asking you to pray for a friend for the past 2.5 years.  There have been many times where I felt the Lord potentially answering that prayer, but then been left disappointed when a new acquaintance remained just that - an acquaintance.  It's been difficult to trust the Lord's plan for my loneliness.  There have been tears, arguments with James (loneliness makes you slightly irrational), way too many hours on facebook, and plain anger.  My emotions about it have been doubled, because not only did I crave a friendship but I wanted that for Hudson as well - a friend for me with kid(s) Hudson's age so he'd have friend(s), too.

But the Lord has also used it to teach me to relay on him and that He is good, even when not answering my prayers in the way I wanted.  A lesson I'm still learning daily.

Recently, a new believing couple has started attending our church.  They have soon-to-be 3 kids - a girl 4 months older than Hudson and a boy 1.5 younger than Hudson, and #3 on the way!  It's been such a blessing to have playdates, commiserate over messy toddler-run homes, and laugh wearily about the struggles of being a mama and wife.

So I'm writing this blog as a prayer of thank you to the Lord for my new friend.  He is a good God and the giver of good gifts.  Whether this friendship lasts a brief season or a long time, I hope to enjoy it and remember my sweet Jesus who has blessed me with it.


"In friendship...we think we have chosen our peers. In reality a few years' difference in the dates of our births, a few more miles between certain houses, the choice of one university instead of another...the accident of a topic being raised or not raised at a first meeting--any of these chances might have kept us apart. But, for a Christian, there are, strictly speaking no chances. A secret master of ceremonies has been at work. Christ, who said to the disciples, "Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you," can truly say to every group of Christian friends, "Ye have not chosen one another but I have chosen you for one another." The friendship is not a reward for our discriminating and good taste in finding one another out. It is the instrument by which God reveals to each of us the beauties of others.” 
C.S. Lewis in The Four Loves