God's lesson of late has been how to be a good helper to my husband.
In Genesis, God declares creation to be "good." The only thing he declares as "not good" is for man to be alone. Never fear, God has a solution and he makes Eve and she is called a help to Adam. As a wife, I am to be a helper to James. However I find that all too often I am not very helpful.
Not long into being married, a wife (atleast I did) becomes very aware of her husband's weaknesses; probably more aware of them in someways than the husband himself. God, in his sovereignty and sense of humor, oftens pairs a wife with strengths in certain areas with a husband who is weak in those very areas. Isn't he kind to do that? Yes, but of course that crafty serpent uses those wifely strengths, meant to be a help to her husband, to tempt the wife to sin against her husband.
In my life I found that this temptation takes one of two forms.
First, I am proud of my strength.
Second, I begrudge my husband my help.
I'll give a somewhat silly example. James is directionally-challenged. Poor guy couldn't find his way out of a paper bag - bless his heart. I, on the other hand, am quite directionally-aware; take me somewhere once and I can pretty much find my way back with my eyes closed. When James needs my direction in getting somewhere, you would think I'd just tell him. But oh no that's too easy .. often I am proud of my internal compass and respond with, "Well, I know how to get there, I can't believer you don't;" gloating over him as I give directions. Or I deny him help under the pretense of tough love; "I don't know; You need to learn to get there yourself," thereby begruding him the help he needs. Now, this may seem of little importance, but trust me it occurs in much more serious issues.
The Lord has been faithful to point this out to be in the past few weeks and call me to take joy in being a help to my husband. I normally don't deny anyone help - my friends, the students I have ever taught, etc... but let James need help and suddenly it seems all to difficult to do.
Therefore, I am asking that you pray with me in asking God to help me take joy in my role as a helper. I think remembering the following will help me take joy in being a helper:
1) It's part of our calling as a wife. If my husband had no weaknesses, honestly I would not be needed.
2) Be aware of my own weaknesses. I have weaknesses which are strengths in James. For example, physically I am a wimp but James - well, let's just say he's an ox when it comes to moving stuff - for that, I'm thankful. And the list of my weaknesse goes on - no clue how to work on a car, procrastinator, fearful of taking risks, etc... all of which are strengths in my husband.
3) Remember my son is watching. Hudson will look to me as an example of what to expect from a wife. I want Hudson to have a wife that will be a helper to him, love him, and find joy in serving him and their family.
4) Christ is my helper. He can help me be helpful even when I don't feel like it and is continually praying for me before the Father. This provides a great amount of encouragement.
Gotta love sanctification - it's painful but so worth it in the end.
|Sweet baby boy|